How often I judge others, thinking I know the whole story (or enough of it). I’ve always been taught not to judge others. Especially just by what’s on the surface – that things aren’t always what they seem. But I don’t think I’ve taken that to heart. Sure, I try not to immediately condemn someone in my head based on the way they dress. Or even on one thing they’ve done. But after a time or after a certain amount of info, I think this ‘don’t judge a book by its cover’ thing flies out the window. I carefully open the cover and make sure I read a page, and THEN pass my judgment. Dear me. This is not okay. Oh how I need to learn this lesson. Never assume you know it all. Even if you read the whole book, maybe that’s only one piece. Maybe it’s just one book in the series. Allow me to elaborate.
Once upon a time some roommates of mine were joking around and sarcastically saying, "it's okay to miss church if ____." and filling in the blank with what they considered poor excuses or trivial reasons. However, one thing they listed has physically kept me from church before. I felt....ridiculed, though I doubt this was their intention. I felt like I needed to defend myself. Explain my actions. Let them know the real story. I didn't say anything, but I was being unjustly judged even if they didn't realize that it was me they were judging. So lesson number one, jumping to conclusions is not good because it hurts.
The other week I found myself on the opposite end of this equation - I was the one jumping to conclusions. I was reading a chapter of Turning Frued Upside Down for homework. This chapter was written by Timothy B. Smith and Matthew Draper and is entitled "Beyond the Study of the Natural Man: A gospel perspective on human nature". I really liked this chapter, in case you were wondering. Anyway, part of it reads:
Let us consider the following clinical case: Picture what it would be like to work with someone who was abandoned by his family and deceived by those who raised him. He is a man unsure of his heritage but spoiled in the most luxurious of circumstances. The client is referred to you because he recently lost his temper and killed another man. How would you respond?
Before reading the next part, I thought I had this client figured out. He'd had it hard but probably didn't rise above it ever and is now in need of serious reformation. Have you figured out what I didn't? Does this man sound familiar to you? Let me tell you what came next in the text.
In the first chapter of the Pearl of Great Price, we see exactly how the Lord worked with such a man. First, the Lord established very quickly the nature of their relationship, declaring himself as God and Moses as his son...the Lord explained his expectations for Moses; then he allowed Moses to watch him work, modeling for Moses the divine traits and attributes that he expected Moses to emulate. He shared with Moses a love and acceptance...God strengthened him and gave him even greater knowledge and insight, line upon line, until Moses understood his own role clearly as the deliverer of Israel.
Is this how I would've handled the situation? No, I'd already judged him too much at the start to recognize his potential or even see him as he was. Without love and acceptance at the start, we cannot be fair in our assessments. And since reading all that, this whole thing has been weighing on my mind. I think perhaps my entire outlook on mankind needs to change a tad. I need to be a little more patient and optimistic. A little more forgiving. And a little more humble.
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